The Wedding Speech
Or maybe it’s an anniversary, a significant birthday, or a funeral. Whatever it is you suddenly realize that you have to stand in front of a group of people make a speech. You have to be charming, funny, and interesting all while not fainting. Oh boy.
We’ve all attended events where a speech has gone horribly wrong. The content was too personal, too many in-jokes, inappropriate language, waaaay to long, focused on the speaker and not the event…the list goes on. You don’t want to be that person.
So, what do you do?
My first rule for speaking to any group of people is consider your audience.
Who will be listening to you talk?
If it’s a wedding, are grandparents there? Probably. They may not be familiar with current slang, or technologies so using abbreviations and trendy new terms will alienate them. Not only that, other people will start looking at them and wondering how relevant the speech is for them and perhaps think you’re being disrespectful.
What about the parents of the happy couple? Do they really want to hear stories of drunken adventures with questionable choices? Ummmm…No.
Consider who will be listening to you talk and as you structure your speech, make sure you are not alienating anyone in the group.
Next, make sure you grab their attention early. Your speech may have a fantastic finish, but if everyone stopped listening after the first 30 seconds, then no one will hear it. A provocative start – a hook – as it is often referred to – is a great way to keep your audience engaged. There are lots of ways to hook your audience. A bold statement, a provocative question, a joke, or a story are all good choices.
Storytelling is a powerful and captivating approach in speeches, especially when you’re talking with friends and family who know all the players involved. Even when your audience doesn’t know the cast of characters in your story, storytelling is a highly effective strategy to keep your audience listening.
About 5 years ago, I was at a funeral. I didn’t know the deceased. He was the brother of my brother-in-law. Dennis was a cop with a large family who loved him and there were many sad faces in the room. Lots of people got up to speak and shared what Dennis had meant to them. Then his nephew, Tim, got up. Tim told a story about his uncle – the cop – getting another cop friend to scare him, to teach him a lesson. It was all in fun, but Tim was certainly quite nervous at the time. The room was immediately engaged. People laughed remembering what a trickster Dennis was and everyone immediately felt closer to him. I suddenly felt very sad that the people who loved him had lost this funny, warm, protective, tough but very lovable man. Using a story to share how he felt about his uncle, Tim truly connected with people in the room. Storytelling – appropriate storytelling (remember your audience) – will always bring people together.
Speaking in public may scare you, but it doesn’t have to. It’s a skill, like throwing a football or playing the piano. To master a skill you first have to learn it and then you have to practice it. And then you have that skill for life.
If you want to captivate your audience, contact me. I can help. Book your free 30 minute consultation today.
